the whole blog truth

I've mentioned this before.

Blogs are never the whole truth. There are lots of reasons for this...but today I'll focus on just one: I tend to blog based on pictures I have taken. And I only get the camera out for moments I would like to remember. Days like Saturday are filled with great pictures: a blissful day at the Dakota County Fair filled with tractors, corn-on-the-cob, cows and very, very happy children.

But days like yesterday, a run-of-the-mill Monday, the camera never comes out. No pictures are taken and the day goes by unrecorded.

But Monday happened and was just as much a part of my life as Saturday was. So today I am going to record it in words.

My Monday really began early Sunday morning with Rory and I both wide awake with an upset Elsie from 1-3 am. We were trying to figure out what I ate, why she was so gassy and were pleased by the Olympic reruns to help distract us from our upset baby.

Sunday night had a similar wakeful time, leaving me completely wiped out by the time Monday morning came around.

My plan from the moment I got out bed was to keep my pajamas on and to wear my glasses so that I would be ready to take a nap when my kids did.

Why that is the recipe for a train wreck day, I will never know. But it always is, isn't it? Because Ivar never napped. And at 7 pm, I finally resolved that the nap was not going to happen for me either.

The day never really started. I was putting out little fires here and there, tending to a crabby boy and a don't-put-me-down baby girl. We moved from room to room, leaving messes in each one. And finally the day was over.

Did I take pictures of any of this? No. Because my family wasn't quite what you would consider photogenic. But if you want to take a mental snap shot, you can picture me with my long bangs I am trying to grow out, stuck in my eyes all day. With big dark circles under my eyes and a nursing bra that had a broken clip on one side and tank top covered in spit up. And the odds are very good I am popping a donut hole in my mouth.

Obviously that picture isn't going on the blog. (Well, maybe just the donut holes...yum.)

Just keep this in mind as you read my blog, or anyone else's, or as you look at perfect facebook pictures, witty and clever twitter updates and everything else we throw out there to project ourselves as nothing less than perfect.

Ivar discovers corn on the cob

Turns out he likes corn. A lot. He ate two ears on this park bench at the Dakota County Fair. A very happy and full-of-laughter moment for all of us.

squeaker

Elsie,
You are so noisy at night. Your dad said to me a few nights back, "it's like we have a smoke detector with low batteries." And it sort of is. You squeak, grunt, gurgle, swallow, cough, coo, sigh and smack your lips all night long. Our little squeaker, we love you so much.

We thank you for your sleeping habits. So far, so good. You are a joy to feed (after some serious hard days in the beginning) and I treasure our special nursing times with me half asleep in the glider rocker in your nursery looking out over our new yard. It's good stuff, Elsie. And I am so glad for the good reason to sit down every three hours and to put my feet up. God knew what he was doing when he built in this regular rest time into a mama's daily routine.

You go with the flow, and are pretty kick back. But you also let us know when it's time to pay attention to you and give you some snuggles. After a crazy first three weeks of moving houses and getting settled in, it is time to stay put and snuggle. And that's the plan from here on out. I can't wait.

You could not be any sweeter little girl.
We love you so much.
Love, your very happy mama

no cow farm

While driving back and forth last week between my folks' place and our new place we kept talking about what we should name our new 10 acres. We have been calling it "the farm" but knew there was something more clever and perfect for our new home.

It turns out all of the nice tree and Groves combo names have already been taken by suburbs or middle schools: Maple Grove, Oak Groves, Cedar Park...

When we would tell Ivar we needed to get in the car to go to the farm he would get very excited. But then when we got to the farm the first thing he would do is inspect each building and announce, "no cow. no cow."

He thought we were going to Jake and Louie's farm. The one with cows and tractors and Ida and Stella.

He still looks for the cows each morning and night as we take our family walks around our new property. His neck stretches ahead of his body, hopeful that maybe that little red barn has a moo in it. And then he lets us know, "no cow. no cow."

So for now, we're No Cow Farm. A farm that is hopeful to one day have chickens and maybe bees, certainly a huge garden and fruit trees. And perhaps one day a cow. 



we're here! *

*Dear Reader,
You probably have noticed by this point that I have not mentioned a whole lot of details as to where "here" actually is. This is intentional. Knowing that this world wide interweb is pretty awesome, but also aware that I tend to share a lot on this blog anyway, we decided not to be quite as specific as to Where our Here is. Obviously I'll blog about local stuff, and you may get a general idea, but let's just say that I won't be putting up our house address like I did in Minneapolis.

:)

We officially moved our family into our new house on Sunday afternoon. We spent the ten days before that living with my folks, which was a really good decision. It was a great breather between moving out of the old house and moving into the new house. And we used that time to have the bedrooms painted before we moved the stuff in, unpack the kitchen and bathrooms and watch a lot of Olympics.

Now we're living in the midst of boxes.

Newsflash: it is impossible to get much of anything done with a newborn and a one year old. Oh, you knew this? I am learning to let boxes sit in the middle of the room and trying to be okay with it. And I am very grateful for all of the help we've had in moving furniture upstairs, boxes in from the garage and for my mom's help in a much needed trip to Target today.

We are thrilled to be here. Feels like a vacation home so far. We adore this house and the land it is on and keep talking about how the whole move just feels so right. And that is a really good feeling.

buh bye jij. buh bye anon

We left behind some very good friends in Minneapolis. I always felt so well cared for and looked after by our neighbors. On every side we had friends who really loved our little family, loved our little boy and stopped by for frequent "Ivar Visits."

George and Katherine lived behind us across the ally. And we loved them and they loved us right back. When I put Ivar down for naps and bedtime, I'd hold him on my hip as we twisted the blinds closed and Ivar would say, "nigh nigh jij. nigh nigh anon."

And when we pulled out of the garage, Ivar would look at their house, wave and say, "buh bye jij. buh bye anon." Katherine often came over with a ball she found while on a walk, or a toy she found that her kids used to play with. Ivar got some cool trucks this way.

When we came home from the hospital, this sign was taped to our door waiting to greet our new little girl from Katherine. It's hard to put into words how much we are going to miss our neighbors and friends on Girard Avenue.

sleep

Everyone says to sleep when the baby is sleeping. Which is terribly hard.

But to sleep when the Olympics are on? Seemingly impossible.

life lately

Six days after Elsie was born, the four of us moved out of our house so we could take apart the beds and cribs and box up the rest of our life. Our Ford Focus once again acted up on moving day. That car hates to move.

Seven days after Elsie was born we closed on the sale of our house and signed our names 900 times.

Eight days after Elsie was born we made the move with a 24 foot Uhaul packed to the ceiling.

Nine days after Elsie was born we hung the baby swing in the big oak tree in our new front yard, unpacked the kitchen and got the lawn mower charged and ready to ride.

And now we are living between our new house and my parents home, watching the Olympics, napping and getting our boxes unpacked.

It actually has gone quite smoothly. I'm exhausted, but that's sort of to be expected. Elsie is a champ and my parents have been fantastic in holding all the pieces together by holding a baby late at night,  getting up with a little boy at the crack of dawn and keeping this mama well fed. We couldn't do this without them.

Elsie's birth story

You know how they say every pregnancy is different?

They're right.

And you know how they say every labor and delivery is different?

They were right again.

I cannot get over how right they were. My stories with Ivar and Elsie are so different, you would wonder how we come to the same end result: a baby. But somehow, each birth story ends with a tiny bundle with whom I am wondrously in love. This tiny little Elsie, all snuggled up in a ball on my chest after every feeding, has grown my heart bigger. Amazing how there is always room for more and more love.

My birth story with her begins on Wednesday. I felt like things were beginning...I had some back pain, some moments where my belly tightened. But nothing notable until the middle of the night on Wednesday. Then the contractions were worth timing. They weren't unbearable, but they were in my back and it wasn't any fun either. Spaced about 10 minutes apart, I kept thinking of all the stories I have heard of baby #2 just "shooting out of me" and since we were three days overdue, I decided to call my mom so she was here with Ivar if things progressed quickly.

She arrived at 4:30am and by the time she walked in the door I was packed and ready. Except my contractions had stopped. So we all slept until 6:30 when Ivar decided it was time to start the day. He was noisy and agitated. He never wakes up that early and was crabby about everything. At one point I heard him say "mama's phone" and this is only noteworthy because it would be four days before I finally found where he had hidden "mama's phone." An unfortunate time to lose your phone and phone numbers...just before having a baby.

My blessed mother took Ivar home with her at 8:00 so that Rory and I could sleep. We slept until 10 and woke up new creations.

We went to my scheduled OB appointment together. I was sitting in the lab as they took my blood pressure and was telling my nurse that I had been changing my underwear hourly since about 4:00 the day before. I laughed and made a comment about how bodily pregnancy is and how strange some of the symptoms can be, bodily, like peeing your pants slowly. But the nurse didn't really laugh, and soon all of the other lab techs had turned their heads to look at me. They kept their eyes on me as my nurse said, "that's probably amniotic fluid. Your water may have broken."

Big Difference #1:
Now if you remember, my water breaking with Ivar was quite dramatic. I liken that moment to a fire hydrant being drained on a hot summer day. It was an unmistakable moment during my labor with Ivar in which I cycled through every pair of pajama pants and ended up sitting on a black yard bag all the way to the hospital. But this was so slow. Nothing like I expected.

The doctor did two tests and told us she was sending us straight to the hospital. It was such a surprise. I was having no contractions. I was feeling great. We had already planned on having Taco Bell for lunch. But now I was going to have a baby instead. We ran home, grabbed the suitcase, told our neighbors we were about to have the baby, and drove to the hospital.

They took me to a room right away. My nurses were waiting in there for me. I went to the bathroom to put on my hospital gown and made a joke about having closed the door...I knew we were about to all get to know each other beyond the need for privacy.

They hooked me up to pitocin and told me I could have my epidural whenever I wanted. I was dilated three centimeters and I was going to have this baby quickly so I didn't have to wait any longer to have the epidural.

It felt like cheating. I didn't feel like I had earned it yet. But I took it.

Big Difference #2:
After my epidural with Ivar I have often commented that my epidural was the best moment of my life, followed six hours later by the birth of my first born son. And I'm sort of exaggerating when I say that and sort of completely serious. My epidural with Ivar was along the lines of euphoric.

But this time it was a little different. I got the shot and immediately felt nauseous. Started throwing up pretty soon after and threw up even through the pushing. I lay back and I could feel the epidural moving up my body...my chest felt tight and then my tongue felt fat. I told the nurse and she had me sit up immediately so gravity could help the epidural back down. I couldn't move my toes and when it was time to push I had no idea where I was supposed to push.

I remember with Ivar's epidural I still could feel the contractions a tiny bit and knew exactly where to direct my pushing. But this time I just tensed my body as hard as I could, bearing down and hoping that what I was doing was sort of in the right spot.

It also made my skin itch. I was so itchy.

It wasn't as awesome as Ivar's, but I still plan on having an epidural with my future babies. I know I was having some strong contractions, but I didn't have to feel them. So I'm still a fan.

My labor progressed slowly. Rory went to get subway and came back with a Real Simple magazine for me. We watched HGTV and Rory read parts of the paper to me. It was very low key. We were just waiting for the nurse to tell us we were progressing.

After seven hours it was discovered that I had a second bag of water. They called it a fore bag, and I have no idea what that means other than the baby was pushing hard to get into position, but this second bag was slowing things down. My nurse broke that bag and told me we would have a baby very soon.

Our doctor appeared with her purse on her shoulder, made a comment about the traffic on 62, set her purse and bags down, and told me we were ready to have a baby.

Big Difference #3:
I pushed for ten minutes. TEN MINUTES! I pushed for two hours with Ivar. But this baby was ready.

Rory had told the doctor that he did not want to make the gender call. It felt like too much pressure. So it was the doctor who announced, "it's a girl!" And I was overcome with happiness.

I cried the ugly cry. Couldn't believe my ears. I had done a pretty decent job to convince myself it would be a boy, mostly because I knew I really wanted a little girl. And I was nervous about feeling something less than joy when the baby came. But when she said it was a girl, I could hardly believe it. The past nine months I have bought a few items for a little girl...hoping. And then she was laying on my chest.

Elsie was beautiful. She looked so much like Ivar to me, just after he was born. I was taken by her fingers...they are so long with beautiful nails. She kept them by her face and snuggled in a little ball on my chest.

The ending of this birth story is the same as Ivar's. Our hearts were overflowing, we were instantly in love. Elsie is wonderful. She sleeps a lot, eats a lot and fills her diapers like a champ.

We're gonna keep her.

"baby, kiss."

Each visitor who has come to see Elsie has been introduced by Ivar. Ivar will proudly walk them to the baby, saying "baby" the whole way to the cradle. And then he says, "Baby, Kiss." And gives her a kiss, quickly looking at the visitor to be sure they saw how sweet that was.

And it is pretty sweet.

welcoming elsie

Elsie was welcomed into the world with joy and enthusiasm. She is one blessed baby.

I am so grateful for our families and for the prayers of thankgiving that were prayed over her during her first hours of life. She has been placed in the middle of a great cloud of witnesses who are ready to encourage and support her... to help raise her in the ways she should go. As the mama, I am overwhelmed with a thankful heart.



It's a girl!

Introducing Elsie Rebecca Groves. We had a girl! Joy overflowing. She is beautiful, precious and seems so teeny tiny even though she came out at 8 pounds 9 ounces. Elsie made her arrival on Thursday night and it is quite the birth story. Absolute opposite of Ivar's... I'll share it later this week. Bottom line: we'll have more kids.

We are doing well. We're working really hard on nursing but I think we turned a corner today. This evening Ivar will come back from Grandma Margaret's and we'll celebrate our family of four. So far he has been interested in counting her toes and greeting her with a happy, "Hello, baby!"

"patience, grasshopper"

This is the invite I made for Rory to tell him our big news, way back in November. It's been on our bulletin board ever since and now the "sometime in mid-July" and "who knows" are starting to haunt me. Wish I had been more specific! But the top writing is still the same...a baby is coming!

Thought I had better drop in, so you don't think I'm absent because we're at the hospital. Nope. We're not. And in fact, I have heard a whole lot of stories in the past 24 hours of babies who were 9, 10 and 11 days overdue. Which means we're getting a bit more clever in how we pass our time. It might still be a while...

Here's what we've been up to so far:
-Played littlest pet shop with my nieces, pretending the pets were spending a week at Mount Carmel
-Had Kyle over for lunch for a playdate with Ivar
-Ate two loaves of good crusty bread with balsamic and olive oil with my mom, sister and nieces.
-Went for Thai with Troy and Sara
-Walked around the Galleria sharing a mocha frappuccino with Ivar and Rory.
-Bought this book at Pottery Barn Kids
-Spent some time under a tree during our morning walk, waiting out the rain.
-Filled more boxes with mom and dad's help
-Saw these onesie stickers on Kathy Lee and Hoda and love them.
-Went to Linden Hills with mom and Ivar to the Wild Rumpus and Great Harvest
-Watched a whole lot of Ninja Warrior with Rory and Ivar. Ivar loves it.

At this point I really cannot complain. I am sleeping fine at night (miracle!) and on the whole feel pretty good...not all that uncomfortable. So we're hanging in there. We're ready, beside ourselves bored, but doing fine overall. :)

climbing trees

This morning the three of us went for a walk down to the creek. Yesterday I didn't get out of the house at all because it was so hot, so today we snuck in some outdoor time before it got too sticky.

When we got to the creek I told Rory that I wanted to sit on the bench for a while, that I felt like I was overdoing it...my stomach was really tight and I had good cramps under my belly.

He replied, "good. keep overdoing it. let's have you climb that tree for a bit before you sit down."

We're so ready for this to begin!

When we got home Ivar lost a ball under his dresser. I told Rory that I am done getting down on all fours to retrieve toys. He needed to go get the ball.

He replied, "actually, I think that would be good for you. Maybe check under the crib too. And you could water the garden."

Heh. He makes me laugh.

The thing is, this baby is only one day overdue. I wouldn't even consider it "late" yet...

My trouble is that a few weeks ago I just sort of decided in my head that the baby would probably come early because that would be handy for our moving date. In my head the baby coming early would actually be more like the baby coming on time. The baby coming on time would be late. The baby coming later than its due date would be hard to imagine. I mean, we move in 10 days. Two of those will be spent in the hospital.

As we get closer to the move date I laugh a little more awkwardly about the absurdity of moving with a baby so tiny and a body so tired. Not sure how this will all turn out. But I'm not actually that stressed about it either. Our house is pretty good and packed up. My folks were here yesterday filling more boxes. The basement is completely ready to be loaded into the Uhaul. My clothes are packed except for a few outfits. We'll be okay. And Rory has had full warning that there may very well be a moment when I fall apart, and so at least he has been prepared.

So we wait. Today we're heading to the mall to pass some time. And we will work in some tree climbing and leg lunges after that.

not yet...

If you, too, are looking to pass some time, check out The Baby Name Wizard. My brother and sister-in-law sent me this link when we were pregnant with Ivar and it is awesome. You type in your own name or names you like and it tells you all sorts of stuff: when it was the most popular, what it means, common sibling names to that name, other similar names...

I spent a lot of time on this site looking for a middle name if our baby is a boy. Enjoy!