motherhood in march in minnesota is monotonous.
Recently Rory and I had a really helpful conversation. It was without a lot of emotion, just an honest conversation about the challenge I am feeling while at home with three kids and how being home with kids all day can be lonesome and get really boring. Not that there is ever a lack of things to be done. There are always dishes, laundry, meals to make, cleaning, lesson planning and baths to fit in. But those tasks, day over day, (as they are for any mother in any circumstance) can make a lady weary. And even though this is what I chose, and even though I feel positively blessed to get to be home, the days can be so long, the time in the kitchen can feel unending and personal time feels like a taunt.
Also, motherhood in March in Minnesota is sort of the ultimate test. It's time for the change of seasons in lots of ways, but the seasons aren't changing. There is a special stamina needed to get through March...
The tricky thing is that I am not actually sure what would leave me feeling recharged. When Rory's cousin Kerah was here we talked about this and how it is tricky. Because time with friends is great and needed, but so is time alone. But that alone time almost has a pressure of its own, making sure it is utilized well. I have found that a hot bath and a good book does wonders for me. And I like the idea of time in the house alone but that requires everyone else go somewhere, which is hardly an option with naps and routines. So then I try to get out of the house, but quickly I make it a practical outing, getting groceries or diapers or picking up pictures that have been waiting for me for months. The days with little kids is just a sacrificial season. And that likely is the point. A mom has to draw near to God when the days feel long and the mess is constant.
But I do have this idea lately of creating play centers for myself around the house, just for me. Things that would add little bits of mom-fun throughout my day. Like a little spot to make something creative. Or a letter writing station to send some paper love to another. Or favorite podcasts to play, always having a great book to pick up, an awesome stack of magazines from the library, worship music playing in the background. Baking is always a good option for me. When life is so reactionary to little ones and their needs are constant, I really have to be better about giving myself little breaks.
Anyway, I thought this was all a worthy topic to write about. Motherhood can be very monotonous. And monotony can be a real mind-game to conquer! For a mom with young kids, there are refining fires all around that are hopefully building the best character in her heart as possible: patience, self-control, gentleness, kindness... The ones that you have to learn through trial and error, grace and forgiveness and new mornings when we get to pray for God's Spirit to give those needed fruits for the new day with the same kids doing the same thing. :)
So I'm off to make little play centers for myself. And I'm super excited about this!