father wisdom from Troy Groves

I remember when I worked with Sara and Troy, there were lots of mornings when I'd arrive to their house, let myself in and find Troy laying on his belly in the unfishished dining room looking at baby Toby. I'd usually go and find a bowl of cereal or something to do, but I remember this happening consistently. Just quiet coos coming from the dining room and a happy dad, loving his little baby intensly.

Troy is a fun-loving dad and seems to be really intentional about setting up experiences for his kids. He'll often take one kid on a special outing: to the rodeo, to various concerts and lots of twins games, purposefully setting up quality time like that.

I give you, Troy Groves

1. How would you describe your style as a dad?
Overprotective, meddling,

2. What resources or who in your life was/is the most helpful in giving sound parenting advice?
My kids have given me the best parenting advice. They advise me all day long.

3. Was there a specific part of being a dad that challenged you and your confidence in being a cut out for this?
The specific part was when my wife told me she was pregnant and I realized I don't know what I'm doing and that could cause great harm to another human being.

4. What is your favorite part of being a dad?
When the whole family is hanging out together, out and about.

5. Do you have a favorite story or quote from one of your kids?
"I didn't get as much tears as last time" -Toby Groves after returning to take on the Splatosphere ride at the MOA amusement park

6. If you were to go back, and start your season of parenting all over again, what would you tell yourself?
Cancel your DirecTV subscription a lot sooner

7. Any words of advice or thoughts you want to pass along to Rory?
Since you were so much younger than me I kind of feel like I raised you to be who you are. I don't like to toot my own horn but if I don't, who's gonna?

father wisdom from Kyle Groves

dad groves, mom groves, lisa and kyle


Kyle is married to Lisa and they have three amazing kids. It's funny to sit here at analyze his parenting style, because I've never really thought about it that intentionally. But I'm remembering some conversations we've had with him as he travelled through Omaha on business or at other family gatherings and he is always so honest and real about parenting. I remember the last time he was in town he shed some light into what its like raising teenagers and told of how they handled a certain situation that we will surely face with our own kids one day. I made a special mental note that night to keep Kyle's number handy for parenting advice when our kids hit that stage.

He is a firm and fair dad. His kids love him to death, and its obvious if you spend ten minutes with their family together.

With this family the proof is in the pudding, and Maddie, Jack and Josie are three of the greatest, most sincere, polite kids of their ages that I know. My grandma went with us to their house for Thanksgiving and the whole way home she kept talking about "that boy Jack...he was so polite. So kind."

Ladies and Gentlemen, I give you Kyle Groves, Rory's big brother.

1. How would you describe your style as a dad?
This is ever-changing, but I’d say I’m firmly even. I try to be consistent & not raise my voice unless needed to make a clear point. I also try to off-set discipline w/humor, when appropriate. I can usually get a smile from my kids w/just a look, & they know when I’m kidding them.

2. What resources or who in your life was/is the most helpful in giving sound parenting advice?
The person most influential on my parenting is the best man in my wedding, Dad. He was – & still is – a great supporter of mine, & is so well respected by my friends it’s sometimes embarrassing. I also have 7 close friends (including my brother Troy) that I lean on often for advice.

3. Was there a specific part of being a dad that challenged you and your confidence in being a cut out for this?
As the kids get older I sometimes wonder if I’ll have the tenacity to stay strong. Keeping the peace can be trying, especially in the teen years, but I have to remind myself every day God put me here for this purpose – more than any other – to see my kids make it to Heaven. They are my primary mission field.

4. What is your favorite part of being a dad?
It is so fun to have a short-hand w/each kid – know what excites each of them, & being able to “get” them on a deeper level. It’s also really fun to watch them grow in maturity & start to get glimpses of what life will be like as their friends in the future.

5. Do you have a favorite story or quote from one of your kids?
I have 3:
· Maddie sometimes plays the role of the “blonde” too well. Just this past month I was asked by a friend of hers if I would be the emcee @ their wedding. When I told Maddie this she asked me what kind of music I was going to play.
· Jack’s handwriting is a little…tricky to decipher. We all sat around the dinner table 1 night while I attempted to read a story he wrote for school. I had tears trying to make it through sentences like: “When wilkenting framler skilvensen it’s best to tristenfin pretarklen dogs.”
· Josie & I have a number of bedtime rituals. They usually involve playing Uno (super fun for 2), praying, then hoisting that long skinny body over my shoulder to sing “Rock-a-Bye Baby” while dropping her repeatedly. There’s more, but it doesn’t even make sense to write it – but I love it!

6. If you were to go back, and start your season of parenting all over again, what would you tell yourself?
Less TV when they are young – we’re pretty strict on that now (no screens during the week), but we made it harder on them & us by being more lax about it earlier on.

7. Any words of advice or thoughts you want to pass along to Rory?
Rory, you are going to love being a Dad. It’s important to have rules, but it’s also important to know when they can be bent & even broken as they get older. It’s challenging, but so rewarding & fun.

father wisdom from my dad

I started Father's Day making Rory sausage, eggs, toast and coffee, and gave him a tshirt with the Strickland Propane logo on it from King of the Hill. We then went to church, and then I went to work. So I missed the start of my Father's Day posts. But I've got some good material again, and today I will begin with my own Dad. I asked these father's the same questions I had asked the mama's and I think it's sort of amazing how different the responses are from the mom's. Enjoy!

This past Sunday, on father's day, we had an open mic time at our church, where people could stand up and tell about their dad. There were lots of powerful stories, but mixed in were a good number of people who didn't have a prize-winning dad. A few who had complete absent fathers. They talked about other men in their life who filled that role.

I sat there and thought about how fortunate I am to have the prize-winning kind. And then I realized that Dad was also that "that other man" for lots and lots of kids at our church, fulfilling their need for a positive male role model. When I was in high school, I remember dad going to other kid's soccer games, dance recitals, band concerts. He may have done that when I was younger too, I just don't remember. He had two bulletin boards in his office...one with family pictures and the other completely cluttered with pictures of kids from our congregation. And when I think about it, most of those kids did not have a father. But he'd keep special trinkets in his desk for them and they would seek him out every Sunday for some love and attention.

I give you, Paul Harrington, my dad:

1. How would you describe your style as a dad?

pretty laid back. give the kids lots of love and affirmation. encourage them often. let them know how important they are to the family circle. pray for them daily. set boundaries early on so they come to understand that certain actions can have consequences. teach them to set good goals. help everyone in the family to respect and care for each other. such lessons serve them well as they grow older. hope and pray that they find good mates for life.

2. What resources or who in your life was/is the most helpful in giving
sound parenting advice? my parents, although they had very different styles. Dad was the authoritarian and Mom was the nurturer.

3. Was there a specific part of being a dad that challenged you and your
confidence in being a cut out for this?
not really. i always thought i could the job. my problem was being so busy as the church. Margaret did a lot of the good work for me as a parent but i think i was always there for the really imporant moments in their lives.

4. What is your favorite part of being a dad?
being so very proud of all that the 3 kids have accomplished.

5. Do you have a favorite story or quote from one of your kids?
Mat telling Becca she was an experiment child from Mars, and if she told margaret or me that she knew she was from Mars the experiment would be over and she'd be sent back to her mother planet. Mat confessing that he had stuck the cat's tail up the vacuum cleaner's suction tube. Also, Becca's trauma being told that Little Bo Peep was Little Boy Peep. what a crock! or Becca getting us home from vacation because she had brought a bunch of change. Annika wanting a huge gum ball from a machine which turned out to be a bright red rubber ball... i could go on and on... it was all such a blast!!

6. If you were to go back, and start your season of parenting all over again, what would you tell yourself?
i really would not change very much. you kids were a delight form start to finish.

7. Any words of advice or thoughts you want to pass along to Rory?
just know that this little kid is going to change almost every aspect of your life for awhile. but the adjustments are worth all the time and effort they require. you guys will make great parents!!

***

Stay tuned for tomorrow's words of wisdom from one of the Groves Gentlemen.

Once a month cooking

Are you ready for this? Because I think it's the greatest.

A week ago I got an email from my sister-in-law Sara, explaining how she had tried Mimi Wilson's Once a month Cooking. I read Sara's play-by-play and thought the idea seemed like a good one, and that hopefully one day I might even try this method. But I had no real intention of getting the book until I really felt I had the time to put into a day of cooking.

However, things changed when I found a few different links online with sample menu's and sample shopping lists for just seven days. Seven meals I could handle.

The beauty of this system is that you are given a menu of meals that includes a list of things you should have in your pantry, items you need to grocery shop for (in categories, which makes shopping EASY AND FAST) and a list of prep tasks so that by the time you are ready to assemble your meals, all of you chopping, dicing and slicing is already done.

You're basically as prepared as a cooking show, simply dumping all of your prepared food items into the pot.

Let me show you with pictures:

I had most items that were listed on this first list. But if I didn't have something (we didn't have soy sauce, eggs and gallon freezer ziplocks) then I simply turned the page and added that item to the grocery list. I got every item listed out of my cupboards so that everything was ready and waiting for their moment to be used in a recipe.

This might be the very best part. Rory and I split up the list, he took one page and I took the other and we were DONE shopping in 25 minutes. I kid you not. Back in the car and pulling away in 25 minutes. AND...for the ingredients for these seven meals, we spent a little UNDER $70. Ridiculous! (in a really, super, fabulous way) These meals are cost effective because you're buying a lot of things in bulk to be used in the multiple recipes included in your list.

When I came home I followed the list of Preparation Tasks in the order specified. It was easy peasy. Except that I cried hard with the onions. And I got really sicky after shredding the chicken. I actually had to stop and lay down after the chicken. Who knows why that grossed me out, but pregnancy is weird, I will have you know.

After everything is chopped and shredded, you follow the simple recipes and because everything is prepped, this stage goes quite quickly.

Each recipe specifies what size of a storage container you need to package your meals for freezing. It suggests a lot of gallon ziplocks, but I often used tupperware and froze a few meals in more Rory and Becca portion sizes so I ended up with more than seven meals. EASILY.

For real, my wife-worth began to soar as these meals began to stack up. We've had good sandwich stuff and produce in the house all month. But meals have been...lacking.

Not anymore!

By the end, I had a clean counter, meals ready to consume and one lone can of olives. Tough to say what recipe they were supposed to go in. But I don't really like black olives, so I wasn't too concerned. Though they did look lonely.

I took all of my meals out of the freezer at the end for 1) a photo op and 2) to clear out the other things in my freezer to make more room.

This looks super tidy, and it is. But you should see the freezer door! It is overflowing with half used bags of corn and peas and salmon fillets and icecream and coldpacks and sausage links...

***

My bottom line in this process: AMAZING. I will be cooking like this for a great long while. I actually was enjoying myself during the process. Except for when I crashed my head into the cupboard door and the room went black and I cried and quit for an hour until I got my courage back to go face those cupboards again.

I also split my time up a bit. I grocery shopped one night, prepped and made three meals the next morning and completed the final four meals the following morning. It didn't need to take this long, but I really did have some woozy moments with all this cooking in the mornings and I saw stars when I hit my head on the cupboard and both these things set me back.

But all in all, if chicken parts didn't make me gag, and if I remembered to shut cupboard doors, the prep and assembly part of this meal should have just taken me 3 hours.

Now, if you're looking for a few sample menu's here are a few I found online:

Click here for the seven meal menu I used that was FABULOUS and included:

(scroll down to MENU SAMPLER 01 on this webpage)

Chicken and Dumplings

Sweet and Sour Chicken

Lemon Chicken

South of the Border Ground Beef and Corn Pie

Country Style Ribs

Pineapple Burgers

Penne in Cream Sauce with Sausage

So far, we have eaten the dumplings and penne with HUGE SUCCESS. Rory is impressed and very happy.

Click here for a seven meal menu that includes:

Cream Chicken Pasta

Brie Strata

Three Bean Chili

Pesto Grilled Chicken Breast

Spicy Taco Salad

Citrus Salmon

Fettuccine Alfredo with Shrimp

Click here for a seven meal menu for the holidays:

French Stew

Sledders Soup

Tortilla Lime Chicken

Chicken Almondine

Sweet Potatoe Casserole

Beef Flank Steak with Mushroom Stuffing

Apple-Sausage Brunch Cake

Happy Cooking everybody! I'm off to buy Mimi's book because I like her style!

the fastest 24 hours of my life

My mom, sister and two nieces stopped by yesterday on their way from Minnesota to Montana. Omaha is not "on the way," but Annika had yet to see the camp I work at or where we are living and I was so excited to show her my life here.

Annika is seven weeks ahead of me, pregnant with her third baby girl. It was so, so fun to have belly bumps together. For twenty four hours we played hard, laughed hard and ate well. It was a perfect visit and I was very sad to see them go.