contentment

If I could go back ten years and talk to myself I would say, "just walk down that aisle. You are making the best decision of your life." Because all day long today I've been struck with one thought, over and over: I am so content. I think sometimes I overthink our life, but today I got a birds eye view, sort of taking a step back and looking at my life right now. And it looked pretty great.

Our day today was pretty lay low. I brought the kids to the cupcake shop where we bought cupcakes to celebrate Rory and my 10th anniversary, as well as Rainbow Bear's birthday. I didn't know it was Rainbow Bear's birthday until I woke up this morning, but Ivar knew, and as a result, Rainbow Bear got his own three dollar cupcake too.

We came home and I made ham sandwiches and we ate our cupcakes for dessert. The kids played on couch cushions most of the afternoon and I wondered where I thought I'd be in ten years, back when we got married. And did I know I would love my family this much?

In the afternoon our neighbor girls came over to watch the kids and Rory took me shopping to look at Pioneer Woman's dishes. We got a few things, but I was most excited about the pastry cutter that I needed to make pie dough for the apple pie I want to make tomorrow.

And then we went out for Thai. And when I ordered my pad pak the waitress whispered excitedly, "and do you want it super spicy?!!" It made me laugh, and I told her no, we weren't there to induce labor. We were celebrating ten years of marriage.

Our conversation was fun and excited, our gifts were each handmade and I felt so peaceful and comfortable in my own skin. That is the gift I didn't see coming...contentment and comfort. I feel them so strongly, just before this sweet bundle is about to join the mix. I can't wait.

It dawned on me that in another ten years, I will have a 14, 13 and 10 year old. And maybe more. And the only difference is that I will have grown in love with them for another ten years. And ten years after that I'll love them even more and more and more. Isn't that a crazy thought?!! That these kids, God willing, aren't going anywhere. Rory and I just get to love and enjoy them in every single season. And there are no two people on planet earth who love them more than we do. It's the shared joy of a mother and father. A true gift to our marriage. And the best thing we can do for our kids is to continue to love and serve each other first. We made the right decision ten years ago. And it's only going to get better.